Fake Baked Apples “Recipe”

I’m always searching for super-easy and healthy snacks. Unfortunately, they don’t exist. Sorry to break it to ya.

I kid. They actually do exist, but I can’t say they are all as easy as what I’m about to share with you. For some of you, you may have been making these for years and want to slap me and say “Duh, you moron!” but if you’re anything like me, you’ll look at this and think “Whoa. That’s brilliant. My mind has been blown.” (I’m building up to this in a pretty major way, aren’t I? It’d better be amazing, huh?)

I love apples because they’re sweet but still less than 100 calories. Guilt free snack! In colder weather, I particularly love baked apples, but once you add in all the stuff that makes them gooey and delicious, they’re not so healthy. And baking things? Just for a snack? In the words of Sweet Brown…

Okay, so basically it’s just chopping up an apple, dumping some spices on it, and throwing it in the microwave. But I don’t recommend attempting that without following my detailed instructions. Who knows what havoc could be wreaked by throwing chunks of apple and cinnamon into a microwave?? This is so easy, I’m not sure it can technically be called a recipe, so we’ll put sarcastic quotes around it and call it a “recipe.”

1. Clean an apple and slice it. Cut the slices into smaller pieces, maybe 1/4″-1/2″ (You’re the boss.), and then put them in a bowl.

2. Sprinkle your choice of spices and whatnot on the chunks. I like a packet of Splenda (Please don’t tell me how I’m dying because of Splenda), a little cinnamon, and perhaps some Pumpkin Pie Spice, if I’m feelin’ extra spicy.

3. Cover the bowl with a plate. Got that? Bowl. Over. Plate.

4. Place the bowl (covered with the plate) into the microwave and cook for 1 minute. Use this one minute wisely, because you’re about to enjoy some deliciously fake baked apples.

5. Take the bowl/plate out of the microwave and before removing the plate, shake it. Exercise caution, y’all. I don’t want to hear about your broken plates. Carefully hold the plate and bowl together and shake. Those apples have steam-cooked and when you shake them, they’re mixing with the sugar and spices. The shaking is important.

Bonus Step – If you want, you can now put a little whipped cream on top. That’s what I do when I want it to look a little more dessert-y.

That’s it! You’re done. Eat them with a fork and enjoy!